Comments on: How many men here have experienced sexism in matters of law, specifically family law?

By: ProfessorC

ProfessorC — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 10:46:19 +0000

6 answers so far and not one person with an example. Just a bunch of allegations. So I will go – me the feminist –

I think some judges have spaghetti for brain tissue.

My son got married young – got divorced after 2 children- 3 years later. At the time of divorce he was a crap parent. She got custody. Some 2 years later he had grown up- she deteriorated, became the “meth” queen, got arrested, her boyfriend abused the boys etc….. My son was back living with mom and dad. We got a call at 4AM that they had arrested her and could my son come and get the boys? They had no clothes, shoes etc. They were found in a dog kennel. My son went in and got temporary custody- the court would not grant permanent custody to him. She had to be allowed to rehabilitate herself- she was the mom. After 3 years they gave these boys back to her. Even after my son wholly cared for and supported these boys for 3 years and she did not visit once. They gave them back since she was the MOM!

That was 2 years ago- we have not seen them since – the court keeps saying go to mediation and she does not show up for the mediation. I have helped my son with countless attorney fees. He has given up. Its been 24 months- they gave these boys back to her 8/13/06. And since it never went to CPS- there is no oversight.

By: Robert G

Robert G — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 10:22:57 +0000

We know of three national estimates of the frequency of joint
custody Child Trends, 2002; Clarke, 1995; Donnelly Finkelhor,
1993, the best coming from special supplemental 1998
United States Census data and also 1994 and 1996 data that
provide essentially the same results. In this analysis, 65 percent of
mothers had sole physical and legal custody, 10 percent had sole
physical and joint legal custody, 11 percent of fathers had sole physical
custody (with either joint or sole legal custody), 9 percent of
parents had joint physical and legal custody, and 5 percent had split
custody or some other arrangement (Child Trends, 2002). Thus,
about 75 percent of children not living with both parents lived primarily
with their mothers, approximately 10 percent lived primarily
with their fathers, about 10 percent lived in joint physical custody, and
another 5 percent lived either in split custody or in some other arrangement.
Although some people argue that joint physical
custody is becoming far more common, no trends for increased
prevalence between 1994

I don’t know if there is dejure bias, but there is definately De facto Bias

Research by Stevenson and Wolfers (2006) finds a decrease in female
suicide and domestic violence when unilateral divorce laws are enacted.
They interpret these findings as suggesting that unilateral divorce laws
shift bargaining power to women for relationships on the margin of domestic
violence or suicide. Additionally, Gray (1998) argued that unilateral
divorce, coupled with common law property division, shifts bargaining
power to men, while unilateral divorce combined with community property
laws shifts bargaining power to women. So while this shift has the
potential to change investment patterns to reflect the preferences of
women in some cases and men in others, there is no clear a priori direction
in which preferences would be moved in either case. For instance, it is
unclear whether greater female labor force participation reflects more or
less bargaining power held by women.

– This becomes a significant fact when one considers that 70 percent of divorces are initiated by women, therefore women have the upper hand in 70 percent of divorces

By: nerotique

nerotique — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 10:16:12 +0000

@sweetkhaos

You should read about something called equitable paternity. Basically if a woman is cunning enough to get some dope to think the child is his, no paternity test will absolve him of this “responsibility.”

By: sweetkhaos

sweetkhaos — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 10:02:11 +0000

Whoa – hang on there buddy! “Men are made to be financially responsible for children their wives had with another man” – WTF is that? With another man!? This might capture the exact reason why there isn’t any fairness. A paternity test can solve a lot of problems there. Each and every one of us, male or female, must own up to our responsibilities.

The system is unfair because we allow it to be. If we could just take the bitterness out of divorce battles.

@nerotique:
Yes, I read about it & have a better understanding. Here is a link I found for anyone else curious:
http://family.findlaw.com/paternity/paternity-faq.html

By: through_the_broken_glass

through_the_broken_glass — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 09:11:11 +0000

Wow. So far I have seen no proof that family law is sexist towards men. Just that men think it is. Where’s all the research people?

By: Dr. Phil

Dr. Phil — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 08:16:45 +0000

in cases of divorce or and child custody men are overwhelmingly discriminated against. I don’t see this changing anytime soon.
Men are made to be financially responsible for children their wives had with another man. How can you possibly be more unfair than that.

The only way to level the playing field would be to get rid of child support and alimony all together.